Best Beer in Uruguay

Rocco Beer Lager Cheetah

April 7 2024

As I sit down to take my first sip of this beer, I reminisce on the previous sips I’ve had in this life. How will this compare? Will it be better than the last sip I took? Will this be the Best Beer in Uruguay? Will it be shit? Will it be a fermented insult to all I hold dear?

The color is a pale straw, or the color of a coffee pot after you’ve dumped it and refilled it a bit to rinse it out. The head was light and dissipated quickly.

On first whiff I get nothing. My allergies may be acting up.

The flavor is light, more a whisper than a taste. The Chinook and Cascade hops are clearly on the label, and probably in the beer; I can’t tell.

At 4% ABV, this beer packs a light tap on the shoulder from a gentle friend. A clean finish, the aftertaste is like the taste — nonexistent. Of course, the lack of flavor goes both ways: I can’t taste anything particularly good nor bad. This would be nice on an oppressively hot and humid summer's day when you need to hydrate, but worry that water may bring sobriety.

In conclusion, this is a beer.

Happy Birthday, Jeff

Malafama Brewpub

November 25 2023

My friends and I argued about which neighborhood Malafama is actually in. We still don't know, but agreed that it must be on the border of two or three, and got to drinking.

The brewpub has a nice aesthetic, with dark woods, copper taps, and old books strew on a shelf. The first thing I noticed were the tanks, and I started looking for someone that seemed like a brewer, so I could ask them nerdy questions. But I got distracted by the text thing I noticed — the best dog I've ever seen.*

Malafama brands itself as an "experimental" brewery, which made me nervous. But it is very much a good thing. I started with a sour, which they said had notes of mango and strawberry. They were right.

It was very tasty, and I'm not much into sours (though I'm starting to appreciate them more). It had a light carbonation and an excellent balance between the sour and fruity notes. Would recommend.

While waiting for our second round to arrive, I'm pretty sure the dog noticed me. But as it was sitting on its human's lap. I thought it would be awkward to just go up and become best friends. But we were making a connection. I'm sure of it.

For the next round, I ordered a rompecoco (coconut breaker), which is a milk stout with notes of, as you'd expect, coconut, as well as coffee.

This beer made me slightly nervous. I had a few drinks with my friends before leaving, and then the sour, and now this 9% imperial. But damn it was good. My friend ordered one after a sip of mine, it was so good. It's very smooth, and the coconut is pleasantly subtle.

I tried their amber ale next. I like it a lot, but after the rompecoco and the rest of the night's drinks, I don't think I can reliably say that my fondness for the beer had anything to do with its flavor.

All in all, I very much recommend Malafama and their rompecoco. This will for sure be a place I return to.

*Tied for best, technically, with every other dog I've ever seen.

Patricia’s Big Four, Part Two

April 16 2023

This is the second half of my thoughts on the four varieties of Patricia beer I found (which is hopefully obvious, as the title kind of explains it). If you didn’t read the first part, you probably won’t be lost reading this second part. Still, it’d probably be best to scroll down to part one for some context.

Having improved my mood and opinion of Uruguayan beer with two lighter lagers, it’s time to move on to the darker, richer varieties.

Dunkel

The Dunkel clocks in at 5.1% ABV with 15 IBUs. It’s a very dark brown, almost black color, similar to cola. There’s no head. It has a lovely caramel smell and I can already tell it’ll have a strong malty flavor.

The first sip delivers strong chocolate and caramel flavors. It’s very sweet – two sweet for me, and I think the flavors are generally too strong, lacking nuance and balance. Still there’s plenty of flavor, which the lager certainly lacked. I think someone that likes sweet beers would find this quite pleasant. Once again, I don’t think this is a great beer, but it has some good flavor at a great price.

It’s hard for me to review a beer that is admittedly not suited for my palate. If someone told me they liked sweet dark beers, I’d encourage them to try it, but I don’t think I’ll be going back to this one.

Porter

And now for the last and darkest of Particia’s four varieties. With 5.8% ABV and 18 IBUs, it looks, as you would guess, black, but I think I see a ting of redness. There’s a decent head with small bubbles.

I don’t get much aroma on my first sniff. On my second go, I smell sweet, chocolatey malt. I’m a little nervous that this is going to be too sweet again. I’m a bit nervous that all the beers here are going to be overly sweet; after all, Uruguay is in love with dulce de leche and bizcochos.

The first sip confirms a sweet chocolatey malt, but it’s not as bad as I feared. I like very dry porters, which this is not, but it’s not as sweet as the Dunkel. It’s still sweeter than I like, but this is probably in the perfect zone for someone with a typical palate.

Similar to the Dunkel, the Porter has strong flavors but lacks complexity. I do think I taste a bit of smokiness, however, which is both unexpected and appreciated. Again, this isn’t going to make my list of top porters, but it’s enjoyable for an excellent price.

***

Overall, these four Patricia beers helped wash the taste of that potentially spoilt Scottish out of my mouth. They generally lack complexity and are overall sweeter than I like, but I can’t complain too much, given how cheap and available they are. I’ll likely revisit the Doble Malta and Porter, but I think the Lager, Dunkel, and I have had our last journey together.

Patricia’s Big Four, Part One

April 16 2023

After my disappointing first beer, I wanted to maximize my chances of finding a beer I liked. And as I scoured the aisles of my neighborhood supermarket, I saw a brand with four different varieties. And it’s Uruguayan. And cheap.

The price did make me a bit skeptical. Maybe this was an example of when all the macrobreweries in the US tried to keep up with craft brewers and produced a bunch of generic, boring beers. But I’ve also lowered my standards.

So I bought one of each variety: Doble Malta (double malt), Lager, Dunkel, and Porter, each ranging between 91 and 95 pesos ($2.35-$2.45 at the time of writing).

Doble Malta

This golden lager clocks in a 4.7% ABV with 13 IBUs. It has a thick, white head with medium bubbles.

It smells like a typical American adjunct. I’m worried. My mind flashes back to sticky floods; music so loud conversation is impossible—which every woman appreciates due to the number of men that recently read that insults are key to flirting.

I snap back to the lovely present where the floors are clean. I take a sigh of relief and my first sip.

There’s much more flavor than I expected. I feel bad about my sent-based first impression. I really like the texture for some reason. It’s a light crisp beer that’d pair well with hot weather and grilled food. I want to go day-drinking with this beer.

It’s not mind-blowing. It’s not a five-star brew. But for a relatively cheap lager that I was expecting to taste like Keystone, it’s quite pleasant.

Lager

I set aside the rest of the Doble Malta to focus on the Lager with its 4.8% ABV and 11 IBUs. It’s lighter than I expected, given it's a "red beer." It's a similar gold to the Doble Malta, but the head is much thinner.

I don’t initially smell anything. I’m concerned. I try again. There isn’t much aroma, but there’s a hint of a crisp, fresh smell, like right after a Spring rain.

I take my first sip. I immediately notice the different texture which makes me appreciate the smooth creaminess of the Doble Malta. I found the typical adjunct lager I was expecting. I'm being a bit unfair; this beer does have a smoother, more complex flavor than the cheapest 30-rack the gas station has that you threw in the back seat and then forgot about as it roasted in the summer sun.

But it's unremarkable. If you want a beer that tastes like beer that you won’t think about, this is an option.

***

The first two beers resulted in a beer I liked and a beer I didn’t hate, so I’m already doing better than I did with the Scottish ale. Neither of these beers are ones I’ll particularly miss when I’m outside of Uruguay, but the Doble Malta is certainly enjoyable.

Having finished the golden lagers, it’s time for the darker styles. But I don’t want to overdo it, so I’m going to make this a two-parter.

I Remember My First Beer

09 April 2023

At least my first Uruguayan beer; ok, the first Uruguayan beer I’ve had in years. (It’s been a while since I’ve been here and I don’t really remember the beers I had before. So I guess I don’t remember my first beer or even my first Uruguayan beer. But I liked this title and I really don’t want to spend the energy thinking about a better one.)

So I’m kicking this blog off with Zillertal Scottish, a dark, pure malt beer made with four malts, according to the can. It has an ABV of 5.5% and an IBU of 20. I can’t really describe the color, cloudiness, or head, because I'm drinking it straight out of the can. Why? you may ask. Well mostly because I’ve already sat down and don’t want to go get a glass. I’m drinking this on the beautiful terrace in perfect weather, and the kitchen is two floors down.

It smells a bit like grape juice, which is concerning, but I’m also really bad at identifying smells; there’s a good chance that it’s a bouquet of subtle and complex aromas, but I smell grape juice.

The first sip is bad. Not bad in the sense of, I won’t finish the can, but not enjoyable. It doesn’t taste like a Scottish ale to me. But maybe it wasn’t bad, just unexpected. I steel my nerves and focus my palate for the second swig.

Take two is better, but it’s still not my thing. It’s a lot more carbonated than I expected and feels too thin. I’m getting notes of “sat on a truck for hours in the summer sun.”

So I’m off to a bad start, though I really think this was a dud. It could just be a shitty beer, though. It might even be a great beer that’s simply not to my liking. One of the problems with not knowing how to taste or review beers is that I really do not know if it’s just me. But I don’t like this beer. Even though I drank all 473 mL. Hopefully this isn’t the best beer in Uruguay, or I might have to drink wine.

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